im a digital recluse
if i dont leave my bed
then maybe i wont have to think about my problems
i obsess
and spend my day
working all day
but at the end of the day
i dont feel like ive accomplished very much
when i look at my cats
im at once
very jealous of them
and also very afraid for them
i wonder what would happen to them
if i died
but then i think of how silly im being
i think of how silly i can often be
and then i look out the window
and realise the whole day has passed
and once again
im still in bed
but for now i guess i still have my little table in the corner
there's still the fan in the living room that is too loud when it spins
there's still the bear on the floor from a clueless guy
and i remember the mustard coloured chair i thought was so charming
but still gave away
in the name of minimalism,
something i dont think i really ever can be
because i think i have too much stuff
too many little things
and little memories
and little trinkets and toys and cards people have given me
but i guess it's enough
and i guess it reminds me im alive
so i guess i wont clean it up
